Monday, June 25, 2012

Great Job!

Continuing this Jimmies theme, here’s a video that hilariously rustled mine when I first saw it a few weeks ago.

It’s from "Check It Out! With Dr. Steve Brule," a spin-off of "Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!" and it’s very much in line with the duo’s notoriously divisive style of comedy. Upon watching it a few more times however, it struck me how perfectly this sketch encapsulates what makes that humor work, in my opinion anyway.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Why Did I Eat This?: Gorilla Munch


As my sophomore year of college was beginning to come to an end, I began feeling an odd yet unfortunately familiar sensation. It seemed that my jimmies had become quite rustled. It was an understandable rustling. Finals and the thought of leaving my friends and the dorm I had lived in for the past two years were pretty good reasons to check my jimmy status off as “rustled.” So I prayed to the gods for guidance and their advice was so obvious I was a fool for not considering it sooner. All I simply had to do was walk down to my local Whole Foods, buy a box of “Gorilla Munch” cereal, eat that shit and hope that my jimmies would soon be soothed. Here are my thoughts.

Much like its Amazon reviews had led me to believe, Gorilla Munch is pretty much Kix but not as good. The taste is there but it lacks that cereal’s airy crunchiness and the mouth feel/texture suffers as a result. Beyond that though it makes for a fine balanced breakfast and works for snacking throughout the day too. Also worth mentioning is that it is and always has been gluten-free, according to the box at least. Oh, and as for the so-called “le monkey face” when you see it in-person it still straddles that magical line between well-drawn and not. Most importantly though, the munch had unrustled not only my jimmies but the jimmies of my entire suite. As they say, “a box on the table keeps the jimmies stables.”

3 stars



Monday, June 11, 2012

Things What Happened at E3

Here's the thing about Nintendo at E3. Even when they have good content to show, and I do think they had good content this year, they are absolutely horrible at presenting it. So to really judge their performance you need to look at the games, not the awkward corporate banter. Everyone also needs to abandon this ridiculous delusion that Nintendo is going to spend a whole conference basically apologizing to entitled core gamers.

That being said, if the conference had ended with one, big core game it wouldn't have felt as incomplete as this one did. There is a rumor going around saying Retro was going to show something but decided not to at the last minute. That sounds as plausible as it is unfortunate. Still, Pikmin 3 looks great. Nintendo Land looks like it can reach out to casuals while mining Nintendo nostalgia in an almost Smash Bros-lite kind of way. Also, between non-specific action figure, Reggie's body being ready once more and "Call Me Maybe" being the focus of SiNG this was by far the most meme-worthy Nintendo conference since "never"

Nintendo had the most to gain or lose this year and in a way they didn't live up to as much of their potential compared to Sony or Microsoft. Still, along with Ubisoft, they showed a new console and announced new games. To me, that was way more interesting than admittedly solid known-quantities like Halo, Gears, and God of War. Everyone already knew this going in but Sony and Microsoft really are just spinning their wheels until the next-generation/wonderbook/smartglass/techno apocalypse.

That Vita bundle was pretty good though.

Unsolved mystery, solved.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Things What Might Happen at E3

Nintendo

1. MARIO everywhere.

2. Announcements of more full games coming to the eShop like Rayman Origins perhaps.

3. No 3DS redesign because Nintendo isn't as impatient as the rest of you.

4. Whatever Retro Studios is doing be it Star Fox, Zelda or Metroid: something it won't be called Metroid Prime 4.


Microsoft

1. Hopefully People Can Fly are allowed to make Gears of War Judgment as crazy as Bulletstorm. Also it's interesting seeing that franchise enter its Halo ODST/Reach period.

2. Hey guys, Halo 4 is a game.

3. Kinect still sells I guess so probably stuff for that too.

4. The overwhelming sense that the next Xbox should've been here already.


Sony

1. Lots of Vita games so you jerks will start buying it.

2. Kevin Butler demoed in Sony Smash Bros. or whatever it is really called.

3. The Last of Us makes everything else look bad by comparison.

4. Reasons to make you consider paying for the Playstation Network. You won't but you'll at least consider it.


Everyone Else

In Assassin's Creed Vita you play as a French Black lady. That's pretty neat.

Two years is too long to wait for Starcraft 2:2.